Halloween special – When automotive design goes bump in the night
Halloween is upon us, which means it’s time for ghosts, ghouls, skeletons, questionable fancy dress costumes and people pretending that eating an entire bag of lollies is perfectly acceptable adult behaviour.
But while most of us will be spending the evening dodging trick-or-treaters and trying to remember where we put the pumpkin, there’s a far more terrifying subject worth discussing. Cars.
Yes, cars. Those supposedly beautiful creations of engineering and design that transport us from A to B, occasionally drain our bank accounts, and sometimes make us question whether the design team had accidentally left the lights on in a haunted house.
For every automotive masterpiece that makes you stop and stare in admiration, there’s another that makes you stop, stare, and quietly wonder whether it has just threatened your family. Some look angry. Some look alien. Others appear to have escaped from a dystopian science-fiction film in which humanity lost the ability to design a normal headlight.
So, in the spirit of Halloween, we’ve assembled ten of the scariest-looking cars ever to frighten their way onto public roads. These aren’t necessarily bad cars. In fact, some are brilliant. But looks? Well, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and in these cases, the beholder may need counselling.
Disclaimer: Automotive beauty is subjective. If your pride and joy appears on this list, please don’t send us a severed head in the post. We have enough problems with parking tickets.
10. Nissan Juke (First Generation) — The Bug-Eyed Beast
Let’s start with a car that looks like it has just spotted its own reflection in a darkened window. When the original Nissan Juke arrived in 2010, it didn’t simply challenge conventional crossover design. It marched up to conventional design, slapped it in the face, stole its lunch money and drove away laughing.
Those high-mounted lights, bulbous lower headlamps and swollen wheel arches created a face that was part frog, part angry insect and part confused alien. You could almost imagine it sitting in a pond, waiting for a passing fly before suddenly announcing that it needed an oil change.
And yet, here’s the uncomfortable truth: the Juke worked. People bought them. Lots of people. Its distinctive styling helped make small crossovers more adventurous, and Nissan proved that being different could be commercially brilliant. Still, if one appeared outside your bedroom window at 3am, you might reasonably assume it had come to collect a debt.
Halloween rating: Six out of ten haunted headlights.
The verdict: Proof that looking a little odd can be a winning business strategy.
9. Fiat Multipla — The Automotive Mutation
Some cars have a face. The original Fiat Multipla appears to have several competing for control. Launched in the late 1990s, this Italian people-mover featured a curious double-decker arrangement at the front, with headlights positioned in a way that made the whole thing look as though somebody had started designing a perfectly normal MPV before accidentally adding another face halfway through.
It’s the automotive equivalent of a horror film in which the monster’s head opens to reveal another, slightly smaller monster. The Multipla’s proportions were so unconventional that you could be forgiven for thinking the design team had assembled it using spare parts found behind the studio sofa.
But before we get too carried away, let’s acknowledge something important: Fiat was onto something. The Multipla offered six seats across two rows, clever packaging and impressive practicality for its size. It was a genuinely innovative family car, even if its styling suggested that beauty had been declared an optional extra.
In fact, its unusual design was recognised in the art world, with the Multipla appearing in a design exhibition at New York’s Museum of Modern Art. So, while the rest of us were busy asking what on earth had happened to its face, somebody was calling it art.
Halloween rating: Seven out of ten confused ghosts.
The verdict: Proof that you can be a design icon and still look like you need to see a dermatologist.
8. Pontiac Aztek — The Car That Ate the Design Department
If the Fiat Multipla looks like an experiment gone wrong, the Pontiac Aztek looks like the experiment was abandoned halfway through and somebody accidentally signed off the production order. This American crossover arrived in 2001 with a bold mission: to appeal to adventurous, active families who wanted something practical, versatile and different. Different it certainly was.
The Aztek’s angular bodywork, awkward proportions, plastic cladding and unusual front end made it look like three separate vehicles had collided in a car park and decided to share the same registration. Was it an SUV? A family wagon? A futuristic transport pod designed for an impending apocalypse? Possibly all three.
But the Aztek deserves a little credit. It offered practical features, including an optional camping package with a tent, and its association with Breaking Bad later gave it an unexpected second life in popular culture.
Walter White drove one, which seems entirely appropriate. Nothing says suburban chemistry teacher with a secret criminal empire quite like a car that looks as though it has been assembled from evidence gathered at a crime scene. The Aztek is now something of a cult classic, and its reputation has softened over time. However, if you ever find one parked outside your house with its lights on and engine running, perhaps don’t investigate.
Halloween rating: Eight out of ten suburban nightmares.
The verdict: A design disaster that has somehow become a legend. Stranger things have happened.
7. BMW XM — The Angry Bavarian Beast
BMW has spent decades producing some genuinely gorgeous machines. The original 3 Series? Brilliant. The E30 M3? Automotive royalty. The BMW XM? Well, the XM appears to have been designed after somebody asked, “How aggressive can we make an SUV before it starts frightening small children?” The answer, apparently, was very.
With its enormous kidney grilles, chunky proportions, sharp creases and elaborate lighting, the XM doesn’t so much approach as announce its arrival with the subtlety of a chainsaw through a wedding cake. It’s the automotive equivalent of a nightclub bouncer who has just discovered protein powder.
And yet, BMW’s flagship performance SUV isn’t pretending to be elegant. It’s big, bold, expensive and unapologetically dramatic. The plug-in hybrid powertrain also gives it a technological edge, even if the styling suggests that subtlety was left behind in the design studio.
The XM is particularly frightening in dark colours. Park one outside a Gothic mansion, add some mist and a suspiciously large gate, and you have the perfect vehicle for a billionaire vampire who enjoys track days. Would we drive one? Absolutely. Would we want one following us down a deserted road at midnight? That depends entirely on whether we owed it money.
Halloween rating: Eight out of ten angry werewolves.
The verdict: A luxury SUV with the facial expression of someone who has just discovered you’ve scratched its carbon-fibre trim.
6. SsangYong Rodius — The Shape-Shifting Horror
There are cars that divide opinion, and then there is the SsangYong Rodius. This large people-mover, introduced in the early 2000s, looked as though its designers had been given instructions to create a spacious family vehicle but had received the final design brief through a series of increasingly unreliable telephone calls.
The front looks reasonably conventional. The middle is large enough to accommodate a small football team. Then the rear roofline slopes off in a direction that appears to have been selected by a committee of bats. Viewed from certain angles, the Rodius resembles a minivan that has begun transforming into a yacht but ran out of time and money halfway through the process.
It’s not so much a car as a question. A question that begins with, “What if we took a perfectly practical vehicle and…” Actually, let’s leave it there.
To be fair, the Rodius was designed to prioritise space and passenger accommodation, and it delivered on those priorities. Families could enjoy generous room without needing a commercial vehicle licence or a second mortgage. But aesthetically? It has all the grace of a wardrobe falling down the stairs.
Halloween rating: Eight out of ten shape-shifting monsters.
The verdict: Proof that practicality and good taste don’t always share the same parking space.
5. Tesla Cybertruck — The Stainless-Steel Slasher
Imagine a child being asked to draw a pickup truck. Now imagine that child has only a ruler, a grey crayon and an intense dislike of curves. Congratulations. You’ve just designed the Tesla Cybertruck.
When Tesla’s angular electric pickup was unveiled, it looked less like a conventional production vehicle and more like a prop from a dystopian film in which the world’s supply of bodywork styling clay had mysteriously vanished. Its flat stainless-steel panels, triangular silhouette and geometric proportions make it instantly recognisable. They also make it look as though somebody has taken a computer-generated vehicle model and forgotten to switch on the smoothing function.
But here’s the thing: the Cybertruck is supposed to look different. In a world where many electric vehicles are beginning to resemble one another, Tesla created something that couldn’t possibly be mistaken for anything else. Whether that’s a good thing is another matter entirely. On the road, it has the visual subtlety of a refrigerator wearing combat boots.
And while its sharp-edged appearance is certainly memorable, the real-world implications of vehicle design, pedestrian safety and external bodywork are serious engineering matters, not just internet punchlines. Still, from a purely Halloween perspective, the Cybertruck looks ready to transport a masked villain, a collection of suspicious tools and approximately 400kg of very angry pumpkins.
Halloween rating: Nine out of ten robotic assassins.
The verdict: The first pickup truck that looks as though it was designed by a calculator with a grudge.
4. Lamborghini Veneno — The Alien Invasion
Lamborghini has never been a brand particularly interested in subtlety. Its cars are loud, dramatic and designed to make ordinary traffic look like a collection of abandoned shopping trolleys. But the Veneno takes that philosophy and launches it into orbit.
Created to celebrate Lamborghini’s 50th anniversary, the Veneno looks less like a road car and more like an alien spacecraft that has crash-landed on Earth and decided to enter a concours event. Every surface seems to have an aerodynamic purpose. There are enormous wings, aggressive vents, sharp edges and enough visual drama to make a Hollywood science-fiction director weep with joy.
From the front, it resembles a futuristic predator. From the side, it looks like it’s moving even when parked. From the rear, it appears ready to open a wormhole and disappear into another dimension. And the performance? Properly serious supercar territory. This isn’t a case of ugly styling attempting to disguise mediocre engineering. The Veneno was an extremely exclusive, high-performance machine, and its outrageous appearance was very much part of the attraction. But if one arrived at your driveway on Halloween, you probably wouldn’t ask the driver for directions. You’d ask whether Earth had been selected for destruction.
Halloween rating: Nine out of ten extraterrestrial nightmares.
The verdict: If Batman’s Batmobile and an alien invasion had a very expensive baby, this would be it.
3. Mitsuoka Orochi — The Serpent on Wheels
Some automotive designers look to nature for inspiration. They study the graceful lines of a shark, the muscular stance of a big cat or the aerodynamic shape of a bird. Mitsuoka, the Japanese company known for its highly unconventional designs, apparently looked at a snake and thought, “Yes. Let’s make a car out of that.”
Enter the Orochi. Named after the legendary eight-headed Japanese serpent Yamata no Orochi, this sports car has a face that appears to be permanently mid-transformation into something with considerably more teeth. Its rounded bodywork, strange headlights and sculpted front end give it a distinctly reptilian appearance. Depending on the colour, it can look like a sea creature, a cartoon villain or a particularly unpleasant dream about a frog.
The Orochi isn’t a conventional supercar, either. Its unusual styling is the entire point. It was built in limited numbers, making it a rare sight even in its home market. And that’s probably for the best. Imagine seeing one emerge from the fog on a deserted road. Its headlights glow, its strange curves catch the moonlight, and you suddenly realise that your smartphone has no signal. At that point, it doesn’t matter how much horsepower it has. You’re running.
Halloween rating: Ten out of ten ancient serpents.
The verdict: The only car on this list that looks as though it might swallow you whole and then complain about the taste.
2. Maybach Exelero — The Gothic Getaway Car
Some cars are designed to look fast. Others are designed to look expensive. The Maybach Exelero manages to look both expensive and deeply suspicious. Built as a one-off high-performance concept in 2005, the Exelero is a vast, dark, imposing coupe with a long bonnet, a low roofline and proportions that make it look perfectly at home outside a billionaire’s castle. Or Dracula’s holiday house.
Its styling is heavy, dramatic and almost cartoonishly sinister. The front end looks as though it has spent years plotting revenge, while the enormous bodywork suggests that its owner doesn’t bother with ordinary parking spaces. Underneath the gothic exterior sits serious engineering, including a twin-turbocharged 5.9-litre V12 producing around 515kW (690hp). That’s enough power to make a quick getaway from just about any Halloween party.
The Exelero’s association with luxury, exclusivity and outrageous performance only adds to its appeal. It isn’t a car for someone who wants to blend into the background. It’s a car for someone who wants the background to move out of the way. If Bruce Wayne decided that the Batmobile needed a little more executive presence, a Maybach Exelero would be a rather convincing place to start.
Halloween rating: Ten out of ten vampire aristocrats.
The verdict: The automotive equivalent of a black velvet cape, an expensive watch and a very complicated family history.
1. Aston Martin Lagonda — The Haunted Computer Terminal
And now, our winner. The Aston Martin Lagonda. Yes, an Aston Martin. A brand normally associated with James Bond, beautiful grand tourers and the sort of British sophistication that makes you want to order a martini and speak in a slightly lower voice. But the original wedge-shaped Lagonda saloon was something else entirely.
Launched in the late 1970s, it abandoned the flowing curves of traditional luxury-car design in favour of a brutally angular body, a long flat bonnet and a profile that looked as though it had been drawn using a set square.
It was futuristic, certainly. It was also rather like a very expensive filing cabinet that had escaped from an office block. The Lagonda’s interior was equally ambitious, with electronic instrumentation and digital displays that were remarkably advanced for their time. Unfortunately, early electronics could be temperamental, adding a particularly unsettling twist to the ownership experience.
Imagine climbing into your futuristic luxury car, turning the key and discovering that the dashboard has decided to communicate exclusively in blinking lights. Is the fuel tank empty? Is the engine running? Has the car developed a supernatural ability to predict your impending demise? Who knows?
That blend of bold design, complicated technology and occasionally troublesome electronics gives the Lagonda a special place in automotive folklore. It’s not necessarily ugly. In fact, its audacious wedge shape has aged into something genuinely fascinating.
But it looks like it should be parked in a secret underground laboratory, guarded by men in white coats and accompanied by a warning sign reading: DO NOT ACTIVATE AFTER MIDNIGHT. And that’s why it takes the crown.
Halloween rating: Eleven out of ten electronic poltergeists.
The verdict: A luxury Aston Martin with the face of a haunted computer and the personality of a very wealthy vampire’s tax accountant.
Honourable Mention: The Car That Scares Every Motorist
Before we put the pumpkin away, there’s one more frightening sight that deserves recognition. The modified ute approaching from behind with its headlights aimed directly into your rear-view mirror. The driver isn’t necessarily doing anything wrong. The vehicle may simply have been lifted, fitted with larger tyres and equipped with lights that could illuminate a small moon.
But when you’re sitting in a low hatchback at night, it can feel as though an approaching spacecraft has locked on to your location. And that’s before the light changes and you discover that the driver is sitting so high you could probably walk underneath the door mirrors. Terrifying.
However, this isn’t necessarily a styling problem. It’s a reminder that vehicle modifications, lighting alignment and considerate driving matter just as much as the shape of the bodywork. Even monsters should be courteous road users.
So, What Makes a Car Truly Scary?
Here’s the funny thing about automotive design: the cars that frighten us most aren’t always the worst-looking ones. The Fiat Multipla is wonderfully practical. The Nissan Juke helped establish a new kind of crossover. The Lamborghini Veneno is an extraordinary expression of supercar excess, and the Aston Martin Lagonda remains a fascinating piece of automotive history.
Each took a risk. Some pushed boundaries. Others pushed the boundaries of good taste. And a few appear to have pushed the design department’s collective sanity over a cliff. But the automotive world would be a far duller place if every car looked like a slightly different version of the same silver SUV.
So, this Halloween, let’s celebrate the weird, the wonderful and the downright frightening. Because while beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, automotive horror is sometimes best appreciated from a safe distance. Preferably with the doors locked.
Happy Halloween from Tarmac Life!
Now tell us: which car would you add to our list of the ten scariest-looking cars ever made? And, more importantly, which one would you least like to see creeping up your driveway after dark?
